Enjoying The Evening Light With My Dad

Today was a good day.

The visit with my father in the hospital yesterday was disheartening because he was sleeping throughout my time with him. He had been sedated after becoming agitated when they put the giant mittens on his hands; the result of his trying to pull out the catheter. Cause and effect.

When I last saw him awake on Friday, he was barely coherent, could not hold a cup in his hands and was scared. Today when I walked in, he was close to what he was a week ago, before this nightmare had begun. He smiled and his eyes lit up as I walked in. He was sitting in the chair, still with the mittens but able to verbalize how unhappy he was about it. In my family, if you can bitch about something...you must be ok.

He began to talk about things he told my brother earlier in the afternoon. About the softball team he played with, probably from the early 1960s. He knew all the guys names. Knew plays which occurred fifty years ago.  Dad, what did you have with your eggs this morning? I don't know..who fed me this morning. But that's ok.

As I fed him his pureed dinner he looked at me and said "It takes real guts to eat this shit." Indeed it does. 

We talked about his beloved St. Louis Cardinals, who pitched the night before, who would pitch tonight. Sports talk will be the last thing to leave his mind. His love for his family is evenly matched by his passion for his "birds."

I don't know how many more days I will have with him, but then tomorrow is promised to no one. I do know that as the last of the day's sun came through the hospital window, it was just him and me. It was a precious moment, a gift to be tucked away and remembered for eternity.

Love you Pops.

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